So Far Away
by anneryn7
Summary: "Drinking yourself to death? That doesn't seem like something a Bennett witch would do." Klaus mused. "What do I have to live for?" I croaked. "Silas killed him, Bonnie. That wasn't you." He tried. "I couldn't save him!" I yelled. "You can't save everyone... Let me take care of you." He requested. "Why?" "Because someone needs to and I need to feel needed. Let me be here for you."


**A/N: I'm in the process of transferring all of my stories to Ao3. The link is on my profile. I will more than likely still post on here, but my stories keep getting taken down. SO, we shall see how it goes.**

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><p><strong>I DO NOT OWN VAMPIRE DIARIES OR THE CHARACTERS.<strong>

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><p>I dropped to my knees in front of Grams' grave and sobbed. Everything went so wrong. Nothing happened the way that it was supposed to. Things can never be the way that they were. Everything is broken. I don't even know how we got here.<p>

We had a plan, when we went to go get the cure. We had a plan and it all went to shit. When we got to the island, we assumed that there would be enough of the cure to go around. There wasn't. There was only one dose.

Everything happened so fast. When Jeremy and I reached Silas' tomb, Katherine showed up and pretended to be Elena. Katherine threw me into the cave wall, before she bit Jeremy and forced his neck to Silas' mouth. He drained Jere dry and crushed his neck with his hand. No sooner had that happened, a member of the brotherhood showed up and grabbed the cure and staked Katherine. He forced the cure down Silas' throat and cut off his head. It didn't matter that Silas had died, because the damage was done.

Damon found me and he brought me back to Mystic Falls. I don't remember the trip back or when I got home. I've tried to remember how I got back and there is just a giant blank.

I feel so cold. I should have known that it was Katherine pretending to be Elena, but I didn't see it until it was too late. I hate myself, for not being about to save him. I should have been able to.

Apart from visiting his grave and Grams', I haven't been able to even leave the house. I haven't seen anyone, other than Matt since it happened. It's been weeks since he died. I still haven't been able to say it out loud.

I've tried to reason with the gods to get him back, and nothing. I can't even float a candle. My magic isn't working and I've never felt so helpless in my life.

Elena won't see me. I've tried calling her, but she won't pick up. She texted me after I filled her voicemail. She said that she didn't want to see me and that it was my fault that Jeremy died. I don't blame her. I blame myself. Everyone has been so caught up in Elena that no one else bothers to talk to me. Caroline has been trying to get a hold of Tyler. I don't know about everyone else. I've seen Matt twice, but that's it.

I drained the rest of the vodka in my bottle and threw it aside. I closed my eyes as a gush of warmth flooded my body. It's my only release. Alcohol has become one of my only vices. Alcohol and weed. I don't know how long I would last without them. I hurt so fucking much. It never stops.

"It's dangerous for little witches to be out all by themselves." A voice mused from behind me. I jumped and turned to see who it was. An amused Klaus filled my vision. I looked him over and turned my attention back to Grams' headstone. I leaned against it and continued to cry. I opened a new bottle of booze and downed a few mouthfuls. "Drinking yourself to death? That doesn't seem like something a Bennett witch would do." He added, as he crouched down next to me. I shrugged.

"What do I have to live for?" I croaked. He didn't say anything, just watched the mess that I had become. "He's dead Klaus and he isn't coming back. Why can't he come back? I need him to come back! It's my fault that he's gone! It's all my fault!" I screamed, hysterically. I barely felt his arms as he embraced me. I accepted the comfort he was offering me. I sobbed into his chest and he picked me up and set me onto his lap.

"Silas killed him, Bonnie. That wasn't you." He tried to console me.

"I couldn't save him!" I yelled, shrilly. He rocked me, gently.

"It wasn't your job to save him. You can't save everyone. You can't stop everything, all of the time, sweetheart." He whispered.

"Who else can? Everyone depends on me and I let them all down. Grams died. My mother died. Jeremy died. Who else has to die because I'm not strong enough?" I choked.

"You don't deserve this pressure or blame. You can't keep doing this to yourself, love." He tried.

"I don't know what else to do." I cried.

"Why are you out here alone?" He asked me. I shrugged.

"Because I don't deserve not to be alone," I whispered. "Everyone is with Elena. She told me it was my fault and she's right." I whimpered.

"The doppelganger never deserved a friend like you." He sighed. I pulled away from him to take another drink, but he knocked the bottle from my fingers. It spilled on the already damp grass. I looked at him in disbelief. "You need to sober up. I'll take you home. Come on." He told me, as he got up and set me on my feet. I shook my head and wrapped my arms around my middle, trying to hold myself together.

"No," I argued.

"Then I'll carry you." He warned me. I didn't have time to brace myself, before I was in his arms and we were on our way to my house. Our surroundings blurred by. When he finally stopped he was in front of my Grams' front door. I couldn't stand my father's home anymore. He was never home, anyway. I needed to feel close to her, so I moved. She left the house to me.

"Come in." I whispered. Surprise flashed in his eyes, but he didn't give me time to dwell on it. He carried me to the kitchen, after shutting the front door. He set me down on the counter and started a pot of coffee.

"You need to sober up. Let's get you into the shower." He told me. I shook my head and reached for a half-empty bottle of tequila.

"No," I refused. I took a sip and it was out of my hands, before I had time to swallow.

"You're taking a shower."

"No." I looked him in the eyes and shook my head, again. His lips tightened and he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder, before taking me upstairs. He walked into the bathroom and turned on the water in the shower and set me down on the toilet. I crossed my arms.

"Let me take care of you." He requested, with an unnerving gentleness. Never since I met Klaus, had I ever seen him be gentle.

"Why?"

"Because someone needs to and I need to feel needed. Let me be here for you, sweetheart."

"You don't even know me. You're just some asshole that's been pining over one of my best friends."

"That ship has sailed, love. Caroline and I weren't meant to be. I know that. I haven't tried to press her into anything else. What have you got to lose?" He asked, changing tactics. I froze and mulled over his words. He was right. I had nothing else to lose.

"Fine. Don't make me regret it. I have too much regret in my life, already." I gave in. He nodded, but didn't say what was on his mind. His brain seemed to be working in overdrive.

"Take a shower." He said, again. I shrugged. He started taking off my clothes and I let him. When I was stripped, I started on his. He looked at me in surprise, but made no motion to stop me. After our clothes were in a pile on the floor, we both got into the shower. I let him wash me and when he was finished, I just leaned on him. It was nice to have someone to lean on. I missed it. I didn't realize how much, until I had it again.

"Do we have to stay here? Everything reminds me of him. Elena hates me. I don't think… Mystic Falls isn't good for me." I whispered. Klaus shook his head.

"We can go anywhere you like, love."

"Just… anywhere that's not here."

"We can leave in the morning."

"Thank you." I breathed.

"A change of scenery won't heal you. It will only be a distraction, at best. You still have to deal with what happened, Bonnie." He told me, quietly. I nodded. I knew that. I did. I just don't see how I can even begin to deal with something like this, while I'm trapped in Mystic Falls. I went through the same thing when Grams died. I had to leave, because I couldn't deal here.

"I _**will **_deal with it… I just can't do it here. Maybe a distraction is what I need."

"Both of us could use a distraction." Klaus admitted.

"What are you suggesting?"

"Let's distract each other." Klaus answered, before attaching his lips to mine. I gasped at the sudden heat and physical affection. I melted into it. I pressed my lips harder against him. I pulled away from him and groaned.

"I want you." I breathed. He didn't say anything, just kissed me harder, hungrier. Everything blurred into intense sensation. He picked me up and I mounted him. He thrusted into my heat and I cried out. I dug my nails into his back and he bruised my hips with his fingers. He slammed into me, against the shower wall, until our bodies sang in ecstasy. "Klaus," I gasped.

He leaned his forehead in the crook of my neck, breathing heavily. His grip on my hips hasn't loosened. I know that he's trying not to bite me. I'm grateful for it.

"Do you want this, love? Tell me now, if you don't. I'm not going to let you go, otherwise. Witches have always been my weakness. You are… What we did… is something else." He breathed.

"I want this." I assured him. What we just did was intense. I've never felt anything like it and for a little while, I didn't think about anything else that's been going on. It's a welcome change.

"Then it's official, sweetheart. You're mine and I'm yours. I'm a possessive lover. I will not share with another man."

"I don't want you." I told him and I didn't. It's not a solution, but it's something and that's a start. Maybe, just maybe, I'll find a way to get through this.

"The water is starting to get cold." Klaus said, as he started to turn off the water. I touched his wrist, to stop him. He looked over at me and I shook my head.

"Then warm me up. I thought you wanted to distract me?"

"Believe me, sweetheart, I will."


End file.
